Foster Care Badge, Raising Foster Children

Your heart breaks when you hear about kids sleeping on the floors at local Children and Youth Services offices. Stories of kids removed from unsafe homes with clothes stuffed in a garbage bag make you cry. You binge-scroll social media reels about foster kids overcoming extraordinary challenges and graduating high school with honors. Does any of this sound familiar? It’s entirely possible that you might want to be a foster parent.

Are You Curious About Becoming a Foster Parent?

If any of the above scenarios felt familiar to you, or if you wonder if you have what it takes to offer a soft landing for a child in need, you might be ready to consider fostering. Becoming a foster parent is not for everyone and we assure you that it’s perfectly okay to consider this information and acknowledge that it’s not the right path for you. But, if you have considered the possibility of opening your home to a child in need, we can help with the many questions that might be swirling in you right now.

Before you go any further, listen to this CreatingaFamily.org podcast, or take this CreatingaFamilyEd.org online course.

The First Step

Your first step should be to contact your county’s child welfare or foster care agency to request information on how to become a foster parent. Keep in mind that these departments go by different names across the states. When you are speaking with them, also ask if your state contracts with private foster care agencies to place foster children. Some county agencies work in collaboration with private agencies to train hopeful foster parents and to place children. However, some county agencies do not allow private agency involvement at all.

The Child Welfare Information Gateway (a service of the US Department of Health and Human Services) maintains the National Foster Care & Adoption Directory, which is a great tool for finding your local contact. The state website for your state’s child welfare agency will have a list of contacts for each county in the state, and this list is usually the most up-to-date. Adoption Program Managers for each state are also listed on the Child Welfare Information Gateway site.

You can also find information about fostering and adopting from foster care at AdoptUSKids.

Start Asking Yourself the Right Questions

Once you have gathered information about your county’s and state’s options for foster care, you should begin asking yourself other questions to help you choose the foster care agency that fits your family (again, provided that your county/state allows that choice).

Some of the important questions you will need to consider when choosing an agency include:

  • What are the ages of the children the agency typically places?
  • What types of needs (mental, emotional, physical, learning challenges, etc.) does the agency typically encounter?
  • What support and training are available to resource parents who accept these placements?
  • What type of support and communication will you need to succeed during placements?

Take our 9-question quiz for even more helpful questions to ask yourself during this exploratory process. You should also read this article on co-parenting. The goal of foster care is reunification with the child’s parents, and supporting the family toward healing requires preparation and commitment to the child’s best interests.

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Gather More Information

Many agencies, both public and private, offer free informational meetings to answer your questions. Sign up for as many as you need to get a good idea of your options. Consider attending meetings where current resource parents share their real-life experiences. You could also ask your county agency for recommendations from parents who are fostering with them.

You might also find it helpful to schedule an appointment to talk more personally with the county agency and private foster care agencies you are considering. Ask questions and see which process and which personnel will be the best fit for you.

Creating a Family offers additional lists of questions to ask when choosing an agency and when considering a placement. Reviewing these questions can spark thoughts you might not have considered yet and help you gauge whether the agency will be a good fit for an ongoing working relationship.

Surround Yourself With Support

While learning about the world of foster care, you will hear hard stories that break your heart. Turn those feelings into intentional action and begin now to create a supportive network around you while you ready your family for the fostering experience. Fostering a child who has experienced trauma, loss, or neglect can be a consuming, exhausting journey. You will need people around you who understand what you are doing and why. Invite them into your process and ask for their support while you prepare yourself. And begin now to practice healthy self-care so the habits of refueling and refreshing are already established!

Image Credits: RDNE Stock project; Michael Burrows; Christina Morillo