W.I.S.E. Up! Powerbook (ages 6-16) – Created by the Center for Adoption Support and Education (CASE) in 2009, the W.I.S.E. Up Powerbook is designed to help adopted children and children in foster care learn how to confidently handle their story and answer questions from others on their own terms. The book presents realistic situations that adopted and foster kids are likely to encounter, and guides parents and kids through different approaches to answering. Organized around the acrostic W.I.S.E., kids learn that they can Walk away, reply that It’s private, choose to Share something, or Educate others. Great resource for older adopted kids, and much of the information would also be appropriate to help tweens and teens know how to handle the inevitable questions they may get about your upcoming adoption. It’s a good resource for the whole family to use together.

I Love My Hair! by Natasha Tarpley (ages 3-6) – This classic picture book celebrates the beauty of Black hair. As Keyana and her mother work through her nightly hair-care routine, they discuss all the different ways she can wear her hair and how lucky she is to have some beautiful hair. The water colors are beautiful as is the mother-daughter bond. This isn’t an adoption book, but is a must-have for anyone who has a Black daughter.

Equalland: Where Everyone Equally Matters by Romi Nation (ages 2-12) – A rhyming story about a beautiful land where all are welcome. The characters a diverse group of children who show us that our differences make us unique and can unite us in beautiful ways. The book opens conversations about diversity, inclusion, tolerance, and kindness. Transracial adoptive, foster, and kinship families will appreciate seeing themselves in the families of the book.

I Refuse to Choose by Melissa Montero (ages 8-12) — The story of Mayah, born into a loving and supportive bi-racial family.  Mayah feels pressured at school to choose which of her family’s cultures, African-American or Puerto-Rican, she has to be a part of.  Follow her story as she makes important decisions and learns valuable lessons about herself and how to navigate the world as a proud bi-racial child. Recommended for ages 8-12. 

Real Sisters Pretend by Megan Dowd Lambert (ages 3-7) – Tayja and Mia aren’t biologically related–Tayja is black, while Mia is white–but that doesn’t mean they aren’t real sisters. During a game of make-believe, Mia, who doesn’t quite understand pretending yet, suggests they pretend to be sisters. Tayja holds Mia’s face in her hands, the two touching foreheads, and states, “No, Mia—we don’t have to pretend that. We are sisters. Real sisters.” Kiddos in adoptive families, whether they are adopted or biological, will always have to justify their family to outsiders. Inspired by a real conversation between Lambert’s daughters, Real Sisters Pretend is a good way to start that conversation, especially with younger children.

You’re All My Favorites by Sam McBratney (ages 2-5) – Three little bear cubs are worried that Mommy and Daddy Bear might not have enough love for all three of them, or that one cub will be loved more than the others. Every night at bedtime, Mommy and Daddy Bear reassure their cubs that they are the most loved, most cherished bears in the world. A sweet tender story of acknowledging feelings of worry and anxiety many siblings feel in a family. It could be very useful to open a conversation about adding a sibling by adoption, to reassure resident children that their parents will have room to love all the children.

I’m a Big Sister or I’m a Big Brother by Joanna Cole and Maxie Chambliss (ages 2-6) – “Someone new is at our house!” Told through the eyes of a new older sister or brother, this simple story lays out all the good things about being an older sibling, and just how exciting welcoming a new member to the family can be. These aren’t adoption specific, but since they don’t cover the pregnancy and hospital part of becoming an older sibling, they can be used by adoptive families. There is also a section for parents.

Suddenly Siblings: Adventures in Fostering and Adoption by Gail and Molly Heaton (ages 5-12) – This workbook of 25 lessons will help you prepare your children for the impacts of adopting or fostering a new sibling. There are practical, easy-to-implement tools to help your kids overcome the challenges common to siblings of kids from traumatic backgrounds and at the same time, strengthen your parent-child connection. The topics include: preventing sibling overwhelm, getting help when feeling overwhelmed, reducing conflict, improving communication skills, and coping with the stress or anxiety they might feel. There is an activity with each mini-lesson so you can work through the book at your own pace.