Developing Attachment in Adoptive Families

Join our guest, the wonderful Deborah Gray, author of two of the seminal books on attachment parenting and bonding in adoption, Nurturing Adoptions: Creating Resilience after Neglect and Trauma and Attaching in Adoption: Practical Tools for Today’s Parents.

Hit the Highlights
  • How does normal attachment form with human beings?
  • What are some ways that normal attachment gets interrupted with adopted children?
  • Do you see or hear of attachment issues very often in children adopted at birth? Are attachment issues common in children adopted at birth?
  • How common are attachment issues with adopted children depending on the type of adoption and age of the child adopted?
  • Techniques for creating attachment with children adopted from birth to age five?
  • Techniques for creating attachment with children adopted from age five and older?
  • How can you overcome the “I don’t care” attitude expressed by some older adopted children?
  • So much of our parenting, especially as our children get older is based on relationship—their desire to please us—their desire for relationship with us. Thus, without this connection parents struggle with how to discipline or how to reach their older kids. What are some practical things that parents can do while they are working on the attachment issues?
  • We talk a lot about our children attaching to us, but parents sometimes struggle with attaching or bonding to their child. What are some techniques for parents?
  • Is it normal to feel like your child’s babysitter when you first adopt?
  • How can adoptive parents find support?
  • How can you tell if you are making progress with creating attachment with your adopted child?
  • Should you insist on holding your child if he resists this contact?
  • Can children who are not securely attached form healthy attachments with therapy?

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Image Credit:  ia7mad