Is Taking a Break from Trying to Conceive a Joke?
Trying to conceive when you are infertile is exhausting – physically, financially, and emotionally. Sometimes you need to take a break to allow some time to heal. But when you took a break from fertility treatment, where you really able to stop “trying” and hoping (read: obsessing)? Were you in the back of your mind still tracking your ovulation, timing your sex, and hoping for your period to be a “no show”? Did you secretly hope that all the ignorant folks in your life who told you to “just relax” might just be right–not trying might just be the secret to getting pregnant.
- I would pretend that I wasn’t trying and wouldn’t test, but when I knew I was ovulating I would make sure to have sex, and if I was a day late or nauseous I would jump for joy.
- Nope! Still check my calendar… Still hope for missed periods!
- No. I don’t see how you can ever really stop hoping or being aware of your cycle after so many years of tracking it.
- I actually did stop paying attention to what time of the month it was (in regards to conception), and that was a great relief. So in that sense, yes, we did stop trying. Now that’s not to say that once in a while I don’t think to myself, “Oh, this might be a good time to try,” or “I wonder if I might get surprised this month,” but on the whole, I don’t give it too much attention. I don’t think the abandonment of hope is the point. The difference is the path we’re purposefully walking down now, and the focus and attention we give to that path. For us, that’s adoption. That doesn’t mean we wouldn’t be happy with a pregnancy, but it’s not our focus anymore.
- We really did take a break, and it was a huge relief. A few months of not actively trying really saved my sanity.
- No, and this continuing to try even when we’re taking a break contributed to the stress I actually should be avoiding.
Like I said, infertility is exhausting, and our minds, marriage, and wallets really do need an occasional break, but how in the world do you get it?
Were you able to find a way to truly, honest-to-goodness take a break from trying to conceive each month?
Image credit: mariela