Coping with Infertility Grief After Adopting

We tell people to work through their grief at not having a biological child or being pregnant or breastfeeding BEFORE they adopt. The reality is that sometimes after adopting a baby adoptive parents still crave the experience of pregnancy and still feel sad at not having a genetic connection to their child. Host Dawn Davenport will interview Carole Lieber Wilkins, a licensed marriage and family therapist specializing in the field of reproductive medicine, adoption and family building options since 1986. She is known for helping patients transition to non-genetic forms of family building, such as donor conception or adoption. Having created her family through adoption and ovum donation, Carole brings a wealth of personal as well as professional experience to her work.

Hit the Highlights
  • Adoptive parenting is the same as, and very different from, genetic parenting.
  • Ways in which raising adopted children is different. Ways in which it is the same.
  • How to know when you are ready to stop fertility treatments and move to adoption. What are the signs of readiness?
  • The importance of soul searching without judgement.
  • How can “throw away” IVF cycles or donor egg cycles, also known as “closure cycles” be helpful?
  • How have the advances in infertility medicine changed the landscape of moving to adoption?
  • How much uncertainty about adopting a child is too much uncertainty?
  • How to know when you are ready to adopt?
  • How to say good bye to your biological child that you never had?
  • Should you go back into infertility treatment after having adopted a child?
  • Tips for deciding whether you should go back into fertility treatment after adoption.
  • Techniques for saying good bye to your biological child that you never had.

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Image Credit: Megan Allen